LXXXXIV. On Success, Results Taking Care of Themselves & Against 'Trying Harder'
Let your character be superior to the requirements of the job, not vice versa. No matter how great the post, you must show you are greater.
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“Discard your thirst for books.” — Marcus Aurelius
These were some questions from our last AMA,
I answered them, but overtime I wrote a bit more into what has become a refined exposition of my life philosophy in aphoristic prose, particularly around how I approach work and success.
Doing Things The Right Way Long Enough
Good results come from doing the same simple tasks well, intelligently and in a solution-based way, every day. Even if the work is boring or exhausting, showing up and doing it right matters. I don’t worry about winning or the results of what I do. That's too much pressure. But it doesn’t mean I don’t care. I focus on doing my best and executing the highest possible standards for any work. Paradoxically, this gives me less pressure, as I only have to follow a series of steps to reach my standard. I don’t care about how long it’ll take, although some actions call for speed, and for those that don’t, I’m too pre-occupied with the process to notice how much time I’ve spent working on them. Many times, I’ve found that when you do things the right way long enough, the rewards usually come on their own.
Failure
When I mess up or something goes wrong, being passed over in an important interview, losing a client or getting fired, I take a moment to feel it. A whole day of doing nothing even. Then I figure out what happened, what worked, where I failed and what I can do well next time. I don’t stay upset or sad for too long. I learn from it and make a new plan. That’s how I get better.
Avoid The Duplicity of Luck
I don’t wait for things to just work out. I don't get puffed up by success either. I ensure luck plays a minuscule role in what I do by getting to the crux of what's working from a first principles perspective and re-constituting it into a repeatable model for future success. I keep trying, fixing mistakes, improving little by little, and doing more of what works. If I do that every day, good things usually happen. Even if they don’t right away, I still end up ahead because I’m growing.
On Strength and Setbacks
Being strong means you get back up every time you get knocked down. I’ve had hard times, failed in front of people, lost important relationships, taken hits I didn’t see coming. But I didn’t quit. That’s what makes you tough—you keep going. Eventually, something gives over a long enough timeline of focus, effort and iteration. Eventually, you get good at the craft you want to master. Eventually, you get what you want. The question that matters most is, 'Would I keep doing this even if I failed terribly at my aim?' Yet, if you know deep down that you withstood and overcame the worst, you gain more confidence and self-assurance that crystallizes into a resounding steely high-minded thought — you were born to reign. You earn the belief that you can pursue anything, survive anything, figure things out and win. That's your soul's expansion; it shows in your eyes, your relaxed demeanor, your aura, in how you talk. Gracian wrote,
“Born to rule. It is a secret, superior force. It doesn’t spring from bothersome artifice, but from a nature born to rule. Everyone succumbs to such a person without knowing why, recognizing the secret strength and vigor of innate authority. People like this have a lordly character: kings by merit, lions by natural right. They seize the respect, the heart, and even the minds of others. When blessed with other gifts, they are born to be political prime movers. They can accomplish more with a single feinting gesture than can others with a long harangue.”
Obsess Over Small Details
I don’t want to just be okay at something—I want to be great. Whatever I do, I want to be scary good at it. I want to demoralize the enemy from ever competing with me. Whether it’s surgery, writing, or my relationships, I try to give it my all. I want to be proud of what I do. If my name is on it, it should show. I want it done well. That’s why the little things matter. How you prepare. How you present yourself. How you spend your time. How you handle assaults to your self-esteem. How you speak to people. How you fix small mistakes before they grow. These details might feel too small to notice, but their reverberations are not. I’ve seen that the people who win pay attention where others don’t. So I try to do the basics well, over and over.
On Having a Life Philosophy
To do well in life, you need a clear set of beliefs, a philosophy. You need to know what matters to you and why. This won’t happen like an epiphany, at least it won't unless it has been running in your subconscious—you have to think hard about what’s right, what’s true, and what kind of person you want to be, the life you want to live. That’s how you build a mind strong and malleable enough to handle the hydra of challenges in life. A philosophy of life also gives you direction. It helps you make tough life-changing choices, stay focused when things get hard and fight complacency when you're successful. Without them, it’s easy to get lost and confused, like doing or buying things you don't need with money you don't have to impress people you don't like. Yet, you get to act with more purpose, more courage, and more conviction because you know what needs to be done at any given moment. That's why Stoicism is important.
Competition
I don’t worry about beating other people. I care about doing my job the best way I can. Did I follow the strategy I had laid out? Did I give it my all? What worked for the enemy that I can learn from? I only care if my work made me proud. I know I'll win even without looking at the scoreboard; and when I do look at it, I put the perspective of my position in proportion — as feedback to course correct and raise my standard or do more of what I'm doing. That’s how I measure success. "So while the opponents had to elevate their game, we did too, but it was a very natural culmination of all our previous work. It’s similar to a wave that gathers force for many miles out at sea and eventually crashes down with tremendous power on the beach." Bill Walsh
With People
If you want people to work hard with you, you have to show them you’re doing it too. When everyone works hard, helps and pushes each other, it creates a strongly bonded team. This bond becomes more than about money or rewards—you trust each other more, have each other's back, care about the work and how it affects others, and give your best because others expect a lot from you and are counting on you. When you push yourself, others will follow. When you show you care and trust them, they’ll care and trust you too. Great teams are built on shared effort, pride and respect. It’s the feeling of being in it together and knowing that everyone is doing their part. And when someone stumbles, the team lifts them up, doesn't leave them behind. That’s how you go far, together.
Carry Yourself Like a Winner
Winners don’t wait to get a trophy or title before they start acting like champions. A pro is already carrying themselves as such by showing up everyday, practicing hard, staying focused, learning, taking care of the details, refining their weaknesses, keeping a positive attitude, treating others with respect, being satisfied with the effort as an entity separate from the results of that effort and approaching every moment with the seriousness it deserves, adding the pressure and stakes like it's the real thing, without burning themselves out. You become what you consistently do. Again, success shows up after you’ve been doing things the right way for a long time. Baltasar Gracian says,
“Let your character be superior to the requirements of the job, not vice versa. No matter how great the post, you must show you are greater. Deep talent grows even deeper, and more obvious, with each pursuit. The person with a narrow mind and heart will be easily caught, and eventually the weight of his duties will crush his reputation…Here is where one needs a lofty spirit, and well-grounded confidence in oneself.”
Be Ready Before the Big Moment
When pressure is high, you don’t have time to think through every move. You can't will yourself into 'trying harder' so that you can win. You can’t just decide to be calm and focused. And you can’t fake being ready. It doesn't work like that. You might even perform worse than you would have by doing so. That’s why practice is so important. If you’ve trained well, you’ll know what to do without having to think too much. You'll rely on the habits you’ve built over time. Just perform as best and as easily as you can at your level of competence. Just perform as you did in your standard of preparation and you'll automatically be confident that you'll do well when the test comes, as if it's just another day at the office. Gracian said it best,
“Don't have days when you are careless. Sometimes Luck likes to play a practical joke, and it will seize any opportunity to catch you off guard. Intelligence, prudence, courage, and even wisdom have to be ready for the test. The day they feel most confident will be the day they are most discredited. Caution is always most lacking when it is most needed. "I never thought of it" is what trips us up and casts us down. Those who observe us carefully use this stratagem, catching our perfections off guard as they scrutinize and take stock of us. They know the days on which we display our gifts; on those days cunning pays no heed. They choose the day we least expect to put us to the test.”
Did you like this entry? What was your favorite aphorism? Would you like more? I’d love to read your thoughts on this matter.
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I loved the part about competition! All the world is constructed so we would compare ourselves with others (in school with grading system, competitons at getting a job, social media perfectness, etc). And there will always be people who are doing better and who are doing worse than you. But it is so easy to fall into a trap of comparing yourself with those who do better and that makes me feel bad. Comparing with myself is so much better, but it needs to be very conscious!
This post is profoundly written. The last part is so relatable to me.
You can’t just decide to try harder, or be calm and condident, and then win games, or deliver good results in life. It doesn’t work like that.
It’s the extremly hard work putting into preparation, practice, training that make your thinking, actions, reflections, etc. become second nature.
It hits hard, because we all know this, but rarely think deeply or have the discipline to follow to this simple but powerful rule :)