P.S: Most people loved the entries on How to Deepen Your Friendships, Part I, Part II & Part III. Also check out the entries on How To Deal With Toxic People & How to Prevent and Overcome Burnout. Happy reading!
“The fortunate person is the one who gives themselves a good fortune. And good fortunes are a well-tuned soul, good impulses and good actions.”- Marcus Aurelius
This is an essay based on what I’ve written to myself over the years on how to get luckier- which has become a self-fulfilling personal manifesto, giving me more opportunities, success beyond my wildest dreams and a deep satisfaction with my life, relationships and work. I hope it’ll be useful to you as you lock in for the winter arc.
People call it luck, but most of what you think of as luck is something you can influence. It’s something you can build with your hands, your habits, and your character, brick by brick. You make yourself luckier by improving the way you show up to the world- by producing more than you consume, by offering kindness without waiting for a return, by giving first, and through how you present yourself. Most of life is outside your control, but that part, the abundance of your spirit, as reflected by how much you’re willing to expend yourself, is yours- that’s where fortune begins. There’s a deep satisfaction in knowing you’ve put something good into the world before asking what it can give back. Seneca puts it like this,
“There is not a man who, when he has benefited his neighbour, has not benefited himself,— I do not mean for the reason that he whom you have aided will desire to aid you, or that he whom you have defended will desire to protect you, or that an example of good conduct returns in a circle to benefit the doer, just as examples of bad conduct recoil upon their authors, and as men find no pity if they suffer wrongs which they themselves have demonstrated the possibility of committing; but that the reward for all the virtues lies in the virtues themselves. For they are not practised with a view to recompense; the wages of a good deed is to have done it.”
The next step is mastery. If you skim the surface of your work, rushing by as you go through the motions, nothing remarkable happens. But when you commit to practicing your craft, studying its ins and outs, and giving it your full attention, you refine the effect you have in the world. You put yourself in play. That effort brings in people, they notice it, they trust you. By putting yourself out there, you collect friends, allies, and opportunities, the nobility of your character is a warm furnace to be around. And when disappointments come- losing a friend, watching a stream of income dry up- you don’t get depressed. Your fortune isn’t pinned on what others do. Who you are and the energy you project: dependable, open, generous, is the best security against misfortune. Goodwill is the best security against misfortune.
Fidelity carries you further. You create luck by keeping to your path, moving toward your goals with trust in your judgment. Life will test you with distractions, trials, money- but when you keep working on the right things, on the things you like, on what gives you the most opportunities to learn and advance, you move closer to power and competence. Confidence grows, self-respect deepens, and you find pride in designing your days to reflect the life you want. You deserve to create the life you want, not live as you’ve found yourself.
And you can’t fake the hard parts. You have to embrace discomfort, the tough work no one else wants, the sacrifices of ease and leisure. Fortune gravitates to those who, ego aside, bury themselves in their craft, who zero in on the details and produce work of undeniable quality. For as Machiavelli says, “Fortune is a woman, and… it is clear that she more often allows herself to be won over by impetuous men than by those who proceed coldly. And so, like a woman, Fortune is always the friend of young men, for they are less cautious, more ferocious, and command her with more audacity.” Essentially, becoming luckier is about being ready when the moment comes. When others shy away, you step in— and suddenly, over time- out of the fortuitous fall of the various dominos of serendipity you’ve set up consciously and unconsciously, you look “lucky.”
Encompassing all this is loyalty. Loyalty to your craft. Loyalty to excellence. Delivering high-quality work on time, becoming someone people can depend on, submitting to the discipline that earns you freedom, makes you more organized. This is where fortune gathers, disguised as opportunity, reputation, trust. Pain will always be part of the process, but if you bear it with fortitude and honor, it elevates you. That is how you become lucky— by living in a way that draws it to you. Seneca ends this entry through these poignant words, applying to relationships, work, business and wealth,
“It is better, however, to get no return than to confer no benefits. Even after a poor crop one should sow again; for often losses due to continued barrenness of an unproductive soil have been made good by one year’s fertility. In order to discover one grateful person, it is worth while to make trial of many ungrateful ones.”
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Great post. I think that part of being lucky is also being aware of when some opportunity knocks, and how to respond. I look back from later in life and see moments where there was an opportunity to take advantage of circumstances to do something in my “sweet spot” that was very creative, but I didn’t have enough maturity or self-knowledge to recognize the gift of that moment. This sort of awareness is something that improves w age, once one gets ahold of his “telos”, happy to say.
This is a lesson that i got to learn about this year.
The more trials you make the luckier you be .
You just cant sit and wait to be lucky