"When they (agitations of the flesh) make their way into your thoughts, through the sympathetic link between mind and body, don't try to resist the sensation. The sensation is natural. But don't let the mind start in with judgments, calling it good or bad." — Marcus Aurelius
This story is about the Lion & the Ass from Aesop’s fables
One day as the Lion walked proudly down a forest aisle, and the animals respectfully made way for him, a donkey brayed a scornful remark as he passed.
The Lion felt a flash of anger.
But when he turned his head and saw who had spoken, he walked quietly on.
He would not honor the fool with even so much as a stroke of his claws.
It’s natural to feel anxious, stressed, angry, excited.
We’re human.
It’s impossible to go against this wiring to become unfeeling robots.
Don’t try.
Sure, unbridled emotion causes us more harm and agitation, but instead of going to the extreme of suppressing what we feel, we can integrate the rational and the impulsive parts of ourselves.
We can accept what we feel without letting it ruin our day, make rash decisions, avoid growth opportunities, or lose ourselves.
For example, we talked about how it’s a mark of greatness to feel and channel our anger to effect change that will impact people.
You’d also reckon that it’s easier to work on what you’re excited about. So why suppress the enthusiasm?
Besides, what’s the point of getting into a relationship or having friends if we can’t love them deeply?
Isn’t that just another cowardly avoidance mechanism to protect us from getting hurt?
Will we be too stony dull to be moved by beauty and poetry because we want to seem tough?
Clearly, there’s no fun in suppressing our emotions.
The Stoics knew that fact.
“I should not be unfeeling like a statue; I should care for my relationships both natural and acquired – as a pious man, a son, a brother, a father, a citizen.” — Epictetus
We study this philosophy to check unhealthy passions so we can get the joy and tranquility of living in accordance with our rational nature.
To be aware of what we’re feeling without letting it control us.
We’re Stoics to be strong enough to navigate the uncertainties of great opportunities, relationships, and adventures that could be life-enhancing. Not to avoid life itself.
Stoicism helps us respond appropriately as the mighty lion did with the ass, because we’re,
“better off not giving the small things more time than they deserve.” — Marcus Aurelius
Feel the sadness, the joy of gratitude, the yearning of a loved one, grief, every emotional experience.
Cry.
But put a limit to it and remember you’re more than what you feel, let it make you better — stronger, kinder.
Don’t surrender your intellect.
And if we feel overwhelmed Marcus Aurelius tells us to,
“Stop fantasizing! Cut the strings of desire that keep you dancing like a puppet.
Draw a circle around the present moment.
Recognize what is happening either to you or to someone else.
Dissect everything into its causal and material elements.
Ponder your final hour.
Leave the wrong with the person who did it.”
Understand that acting with virtue is all that matters and,
“Be like a rock: the waves beat against it continuously, but it stands fast and around it the raging water dies down.” — Marcus Aurelius
Today, journal to process and reflect on an uncomfortable event from the past.
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Thank you for reminding me to journal my feelings rather than to ignore them
This is helpful. This does encourage us to acknowledge our feelings. We don’t put our feelings “in the driver’s seat,” though.