LXXXIX. The Dark Side of Stoicism
Fate guides the man who's willing, drags the unwilling.
"First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do." — Epictetus
I'm always up before the sun splashes its light on the city. I lift or do calisthenics. I shower. I head to the hospital where the work starts before I'm fully awake and ends long after I should've gone home. My shift runs long. Sometimes twelve hours. Sometimes more. In between cases, I write. I jot down notes in corridors, between patients, after consultations, sometimes right before a procedure. I've gotten good at catching ideas before they disappear — like trapping steam in your hands. You'd think I'd be used to the groove by now. But truth is, most days, I don't want to do any of it. Not the work. Not the writing. Not the getting up before dawn. My body aches. My brain feels slow. My will drags everything forward by the collar.
My line of work can lead to burnout if you're not careful. So I still make time to nap. To read. To walk. At leas…
