Welcome, dear ! It’s difficult to accept the limits of our control when someone or something is important to us. We can understand Epictetus and still spend the afternoon checking, worrying or micromanaging. Today’s workbook asks us to examine what drives that behaviour, what good conduct requires, and how we can judge ourselves when careful and effortful work ends in disappointment. If you missed the last Stoic Workbook edition on On the Cost of Losing Your Attention, you can catch up right here.
The wagon lurched to a stop. It had been a rainy day and the wheel had sunk deep into the muddy road such that the horses could no longer pull it.
The farmer climbed down, furious at his luck.
He called on Hercules for help.
The god appeared and told him, “Do you think you can move the wagon by simply looking at it and whining about it? Hercules will not help unless you make some effort to help yourself.”
He had to put his shoulder to the wheel and urge the horses forward. That’s how he got out of the predicament.
See, we can understand the need to make an effort from Aesop’s fables,
But it’s also discouraging when we have put our shoulder to the wheel and it still won’t move. Someone may be depending on us. We may have prepared carefully and done everything we could. Uncertainty brings a lot of anxiety.
That’s why I want us to figure out a better way to approach our work and ambitions. How do we give people and responsibilities our full care while accepting that the result remains partly beyond us?
Keep one such situation in mind as you work through today’s questions.
October 28, 2026 — On caring deeply without demanding control
Epictetus, Discourses 2.5
The material of life is neither morally good nor bad in itself; how we handle it is our responsibility. In a ball game, the ball is just a ball. The skill lies in how players catch, pass and coordinate under changing conditions. So too in life: health, work, wealth and even other people are material for the exercise of judgment. Care about your performance and the people involved, while remembering that the ultimate result also depends upon circumstances beyond your command.
Socratic Questions for self-examination
Does separating moral excellence from outcomes work when…