LV. How to Let Go
If I die, I die.
The ‘Neuroscience-based Tools’ & ‘Lead to Win’ sections are companions for The Stoic Manual to help you become wealthier, happier & more powerful by boosting your resilience, motivation, relationships, focus, overall health, and leadership skills—by Dr. Antonius Veritas.
P.S: Scroll to the end for a Stoic actionable mini-course to help you let go.
“Begin at once to live, and count each separate day as a separate life.”–Seneca
Merry Christmas everyone! 🥂
Today I want us to dissect an obstacle that could threaten our enjoyment this holiday season: the pathological need for control.
See, what if we relaxed our tight grip on life?
If we stopped clenching at every fleeting worry, gripping onto every fear, and clutching at every fleeting desire?
We’d find freedom.
Not the careless kind that comes from apathy, but a bold, daring freedom—the kind that empowers us to claim the good things we deserve and push beyond our hesitations.
Years ago, I caught a glimpse of this freedom when I told myself, “If I die, I die,” before approaching a girl I liked.
For a moment, I was unstoppable, stepping past the labyrinth of fear into courage.
The girl liked it.
My friends admired me for it.
Yet that confidence was short-lived.
Doubts about my self-worth got the best of me.
Instead of continuing to risk it all, I retreated, settling for safe, small pursuits.
Looking back, I wonder.
Why do we build walls around our desires?
Why do we treat our lives as fragile when they are meant to be lived, as Nietzche talked about, dangerously for the utmost enjoyment?
Why do we leave our happiness to chance or wait for people to save us?
If we loosened our grip, we’d let go of the ghosts of who we once were—the unambitious, entitled, aimless parts of us.
We’d stop holding ourselves hostage to past failures or habits and instead focus on who we’re becoming.
Who we truly are.
We could ask more from life because we believe we deserve all the nice things we admire.
Imagine waking each day with the boisterousness of a clear purpose and a positive cycle of wins.
Of crafting ourselves like one of Michelangelo’s pieces.
Imagine seeing our daily routines—strengthening the body, sharpening the mind, running our business, nurturing our craft, cultivating our relationships—not as tasks, but as acts of becoming. Of being.
Of acquiring the strength, respect, and power for a smooth life
The truth is, we’re only a few steps away from the life we deserve, and it’s only fear that halts that process.
Letting go is a conscious decision to transcend fear.
What if we stopped obsessing over failure?
What if we stopped treating pain as an enemy and pleasure as a crutch?
Pain sharpens us—also reduces competition, and pleasure often blinds us.
Living boldly means stepping into discomfort willingly, not to suffer for its own sake, but because the things that matter—the audacious goals, the thrilling business risks, the deep loves—exist just on the other side of fear.
But when we cling too tightly to comfort, we become enslaved by it.
By letting go, we stop being ruled by external things: the need for validation, the attachment to possessions, or even the preciousness of life itself.
We start to live with disdain for trivialities, pouring ourselves fully into what matters.
This isn’t nihilism; it’s freedom.
It’s spending life like the most generous of treasures, as if we’ve already been gifted another.
Letting go also doesn’t mean drifting without direction.
It means aligning with a higher purpose—one rooted in virtue and authenticity.
Other Resources
Practical Strategies to Let Go and Embrace Bold Living
As someone who struggled with letting go, I’ve found that the usual advice—"just stop worrying" or "focus on what you can control"—can feel abstract.
Bold living requires actionable steps, for letting go is a skill we cultivate.
Here are the practical steps to help you integrate this practice into your daily life.
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