XII. How to Argue
It’s the truth I’m after, and the truth never harmed anyone.
"If anyone can refute me—show me I’m making a mistake or looking at things from the wrong perspective—I’ll gladly change. It’s the truth I’m after, and the truth never harmed anyone. What harms us is to persist in self-deceit and ignorance." — Marcus Aurelius
Conflict is good when you approach it as a chance to deepen the connection with your friend or spouse rather than prove how right you are.
Or subdue people with your intellect.
This approach allows you to see and appreciate people’s perspectives while giving them the respect necessary to express their opinion.
So,
Entertain the idea that you could be wrong and another could be right without losing your confidence.
Repeat back the ideas people express and ask if you’ve understood them so you’re on the same page.
Then move to poke holes in their argument, if it’s wrong, while supporting your statements.
This way you get to give people the rare gift of understanding and empathy.
Sometimes you compr…
